How to Have a Happy Birthday

If you want to have a Happy Birthday, decide ahead of time that you will. Attitude is 90 percent of having a happy day.

If your husband happens to be home and agreeable, kick off the celebration by going out - alone! - for an hour on your Birthday Eve. Enjoy the quiet drive to the electronics store. Return the tablet that you bought to replace your deceased laptop, and pick out a shiny new Samsung laptop instead. The tablet is a neat piece of technology, but not very functional for managing a home, school, business, and social life at the same time. Don't waste time mourning the death of your old laptop, even if it did eat your baby's six month pictures and all of your documents when the hard drive crashed. Your blog readers will understand why they'll never see those image-laden posts you had intended to write last week. Take this as a reminder to back up anything important. Right now. (I'm talking to you. Stop reading and go back up your pictures!)

Before heading to bed, change your earrings. If your husband has turned you into a girlie-girl (and he has), he'll want you to have a girl's best friend, and you'll want to look a little extra special for your special day.

On your birthday morning, wake up early - even if you think you could use another hour of sleep. You don't want to waste your birthday lying around in bed. Enjoy your husband's presence, since he is usually at work long before you open your eyes in the morning. Graciously remind him and your children what day it is. Never resent others for not being as date-conscious as you are. If the day matters to you, tell them, smile, and return their birthday hugs.

Check in with your Bible study group on Facebook. Spend some time in the Word, remembering Who gave you this day and every other. Read messages and emails from friends. You just might have a message inviting you to a tour of a local dairy farm on that very day. Since the sun is shining, everyone is healthy, and you have a vehicle for the first time this week, you should go! Plus, you love cows. (Don't you?)

Don't skip your workout; exercise will help keep you happy, and burn off a few of those birthday treat calories too. Shower, eat, and pack up the children for a fun field trip adventure. Meet up with your friend Nancy and her little ones, known by your children as "the family we met in the bikes," because she recognized you from your blog posts and introduced herself when your families were both shopping at WalMart one day. Meet some other homeschooling families, a farmer, and lots of cows.

Learn alongside your children about how the cows are cared for and the milk is processed. Buy plenty of goodies at the farm store - it is your birthday, after all. Rare treats of ice cream, pie, and honey sticks will make the day so much sweeter.

When you arrive home in the afternoon, watch with delight as a monarch butterfly flits arounds your front door. Let the children stay outside and enjoy the beautiful weather. Accept and cherish their offerings of weeds, wildflowers, and a heart-shaped leaf. Then send the older ones to your mother-in-law's. They'll have fun playing with relatives while you enjoy some relative peace and quiet.

Snuggle up with baby in your favorite nursing chair and take a nap together. You won't get much done, you might not even get much rest, but you'll want to savor this moment. Remember doing the same thing half a year ago with your tiny newborn? Before you know it, a few more half-years will go by, and she will be too big for nursing and snuggly afternoon naps in your arms.

If you have time, send a few emails so you can feel like you were productive. Smile that birthday cards and the book you pre-ordered a few weeks ago arrived in the mail. Share your testimony with friends, and reflect on God's grace in your life. Bake the chicken pie (that you bought at the farm) to share with your family when they come home. Finish the day with apple pie, Bible stories, and hugs. Contemplate writing a blog post to recount all of the little blessings of the day. You have had a simple but wonderful birthday, and you are thankful!

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.
James 1:17

Simply Walking

Today I am participating in Living Simply Saturday at Keeper of the Home. For me, living simply means getting rid of excess things and activities that create stress instead of peace in my home. One surprising way I have simplified my life is parting with one of our family cars, leaving me "stuck" at home all the time. Be sure to read yesterday's post, Totaled Blessings, to learn the background on how our family ended up with just one vehicle. Then read on while I share some of the blessings of this particular simplicity.

Certainly there are drawbacks to sharing a car, but the savings on auto insurance is just the beginning of the weighty benefits. Appointments must be scheduled carefully, and if I do need to go somewhere, the boys and I spend more than two hours in the car dropping Daddy off at work and picking him up in the evening. However, those long car rides afford me an opportunity to talk with my husband and see what he experiences during his daily commute - an opportunity that would never exist if I had my own car to use. I cannot decide on a whim to run to the store; I have had to relinquish self-sufficiency and instead rely on others - in this case, my husband - to help me accomplish errands I previously would have handled on my own, such as banking and Post Office trips. I cannot take the boys to the Thursday morning toddler program at the library, but we can go on Saturday mornings to pick out new books to pore over for the next four weeks. Once in a while I worry that Hayden will split his head open and I will have no way to drive him to the hospital, but I trust that God is in control. And - this is really the one thing I miss about having a car - I cannot get together regularly with a dear friend, who has young boys of her own, for playdates. But I find that because our visits are few and must be scheduled far in advance, the time we spend together is even more precious.

And it is not just time with friends that is precious. My children are growing so quickly. Do I really want to spend my days impatiently strapping them into the backseat of a car so I can rush off to some errand or extracurricular? I know that such activities can be beneficial or at least necessary, but for this season of my life, I am thankful to have no choice but to stay home. More important than even the fellowship with other Christian ladies at Bible study is fellowship with my own family and learning to be patient with my children - something I was sadly lacking when we had to rush out of the house by 8:30am. I can give the children the structure and routine that makes their days run smoothly, instead of disrupting meals and naps while we drive all over town. And I can learn to delay gratification, even the housewifely gratification of running to the store for a forgotten food item, because I simply have no way to get things immediately. In this hurried world, where life often goes speeding by before we realize it, being forced to slow down and walk has helped me to grow a bit of patience and peace.

Yes, as I sit here in the grass watching the boys blow bubbles into the breeze...or on the living room floor, eating a bowl of soup that Donny concocted for me with wooden vegetables, a toy pot, and a heap of imagination...or leisurely snapping green beans at the kitchen table because I don't have to rush to make dinner, while my "helpers" put half chewed beans into the pot...I know I am blessed. I may not have the freedom to leave home at a moment's notice, but I have freedom to savor every moment in the place I live with the people I love. Thank you, Lord, for teaching me that joy is not in driving here or there, but in fulfilling my calling to be home as I simply walk daily with You.

Blessed are all who fear the LORD, who walk in his ways.
Psalm 128:1

Totaled Blessings

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. - Romans 8:28

What appears to be misfortune can sometimes be a blessing in disguise. I found this to be true for our family after we experienced two serious car accidents. Four years ago, when I was pregnant with Donny, I was driving to my mom's birthday party one afternoon when an SUV pulled out in front of me. The inevitable collision caused the air bag to deploy, scraping open my hand, and my car was totaled. Since I (thankfully!) wasn't at fault, I was able to replace my Plymouth Neon with a Dodge Neon of the same year, and the settlement for my injuries paid off the little that I owed on the car.

A year and a half later, a similar accident totaled Don's two door Ford, a car that was relatively useless for a family hauling an oversize car seat and jogging stroller (not to mention that it was a standard, and I never learned how to drive it). With the insurance money, we paid off the remaining debt on the Ford and have been blessedly debt-free ever since. We briefly discussed the possibility of being a one car family, but I recoiled in horror at the thought. And at the time, with Don's long commute to work and my frequent prenatal checkups, it would not have been very practical. We decided to purchase an older, roomier car that would be both efficient for commuting and suitable for the whole family.

What we didn't realize was that our trusty new (to us) vehicle was apparently a victim of the recent local flooding. After nearly two years and a few repairs, the brakes went out, and because the bottom of the car was completely rusted, it would have cost nearly as much as the car was worth to repair it. Unwilling to waste money fixing a car that was likely to die soon anyway, we began to research minivans; after all, we would need a bigger vehicle whenever God blessed us with another baby, and it was a tight squeeze to fit even our family of four into the Neon. But after we test drove a few of the most promising used models, we couldn't justify spending our entire life savings on a van that made strange clicking noises whenever we used the brake. In retrospect, with this summer of skyrocketing gas prices, we have been very thankful that we did not sacrifice the Neon's better gas mileage for a bigger vehicle that we did not truly need.

And so, one sunny day last April, our children watched intently through the window as a flatbed trailer came to tow away Daddy's car. We had decided to donate the car to charity and to live with one car, at least temporarily. Don would take the Neon to work Monday through Friday. I would no longer be able to attend a weekday morning Bible Study, but the study I was participating in had just ended anyway. I would also need to reschedule my Monday morning grocery shopping trip. Don volunteered to stop at the grocery store on his way home from work, and I - having done 100% of the grocery shopping since we were first married - protested at first, but agreed to try it.

As it turns out, my husband is a very competent shopper. After the success of his first trip, he has taken over my weekly responsibility. Every Monday I email him the grocery list, and he buys exactly what I request. Yes, exactly - nothing extra, nothing forgotten. I remember one cold winter when my boys were small and bundling them up for a trek to the supermarket was an all day affair, I looked into the possibly of an online grocery delivery service, but we were concerned about the delivery charge and the possibility of getting bruised fruit, wilted veggies, and about-to-expire milk. Now I have the best of both worlds: I don't have to wrestle a toddler into his shoes and jacket and then try to keep him entertained and seated while I manuever through crowded aisles with a baby strapped to my chest. I have another free morning to spend at home, catching up on chores or just having fun with the children. And on Monday night, we herald the arrival of a certain Dodge Neon much the way others would look for a familiar delivery truck, for the boys and I know that Daddy will be coming home with bags full of our favorite foods.

For our other shopping needs, I have long since relied on the Internet. I buy toiletries, vitamins, diapers (both cloth and disposable), gifts, and even clothing online. (I get all of my disposable diapers and wipes at Diapers.com; they also have a large selection of other baby products, including several natural ones. You can enter referral code 4thelambs to receive $10 off your first order.) We have gotten to know the mail carrier and the UPS man because we are continually receiving packages. We are also blessed to live within walking distance of many places. By foot and stroller, the children and I have returned library books to the book drop, mailed packages in the big blue mailbox, bought milk at the gas station, picked up prescriptions at the pharmacy, shopped at the discount store, walked to my doctor appointments, and even attended a free class at Gymboree. If we ever wanted to eat fast food, we would have a wide selection of restaurants to choose from, and it's not too far to a bakery or a used book store. We can even drop the car off for an oil change and walk home while we wait. But even with all these interesting destinations near by, I can't say that giving up my car has sent me running out of the house. In fact, I have hardly missed having a car at all; it seems perfectly normal and wonderful to be home all of the time. Since we became a one car family, I have experienced so many blessings, but to avoid making this post excessively long, the details will have to wait for next time.