Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Life in the Middle Lane

Today is a day for celebrating, because today the Lord has blessed our savings account with five digits. Considering that less than three years ago Don and I were $14,000 dollars in debt (which we paid off over a year ago, praise God), I am awed and impressed that we've been able to save so much from a modest single income. God is good!

ING Direct, we get to nickname our savings accounts, and we have dubbed our long-term savings account "House Van Israel Gym TX." The lengthy title (which could have been longer, but I was limited to 30 characters) reflects the many possibilities of how we might eventually spend our savings. We would love to buy a house, but can't afford it yet - at least, not here in New England. We want to get a minivan at some point, but it's not a necessity yet. Last year, God seemed to be calling us to go to Israel, but our after much effort we learned that was impossible. Don's dream is to own a gymnastics facility, but it's difficult to start one when we don't even own a home yet. And Texas has been our latest plan-of-the-month. We always have so many plans, which usually appear to include God, but so far He hasn't actually opened the door for us to pursue them. But our bank account is growing as our savings accumulate interest each month, and I am sure that I too am growing as God teaches to wait patiently on Him.

During our recent three-day Texas trip, Don and I took a picture of this sign that we saw in Dallas - we thought it was funny that cars in the middle lane can go in any direction! Later, we realized how perfectly the image fits our life right now. All year, I have had the feeling that some big change is just around the corner. We almost bought a minivan, but decided it was too expensive (a wise decision, in retrospect, since gas prices have soared, and we can still squeeze our family of four into our Neon). I thought God was leading me to join Don in working with the youth group at church, which resulted in an opportunity for us to take on a leadership role together, but then we realized that we had some major doctrinal differences with the church, and we were asked not to teach at all. Our most recent Almost has been moving to Dallas. Don thought that studying at seminary would help him equip him for future theological debates and discussions, and we had heard good things about Dallas Theological Seminary. Adding this to the temperate weather (Don hates the cold, so we have often discussed moving south), the favorable Republican politics, and the unbelievably affordable housing (we could actually buy a home!), we decided to look into relocating. Don landed a job interview and we spent the weekend there househunting. After a few weeks of waiting, he finally decided not to accept the position, and now I truly don't know whether Texas is in our future, or whether we will be staying in New England for a while.

There are so many directions we could possibly go (Move to Texas? Buy a home? Stay here and start a gym?), and we don't have any clearly typed printed "ONLY" arrows to point the way. It seems like we're stuck in the middle lane, waiting for a signal from God, but for now it's just a red light. The Bible gives us wisdom and principles to follow, but are no prophecies that reveal our earthly future. And as much my little human mind wants to know where we're going, I know that in light of eternity, it really doesn't matter. In the end, the Lord's purpose will prevail, and I trust our Shepherd to point the way when it's time to move forward.

While we were in Texas, God brought this very fitting Proverb to my attention - I am using it in my email signature so that the reminder is constantly before me:

Many are the plans in a man's heart,
but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails.

Proverbs 19:21

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